Lamar Odom considers himself a walking miracle. The celebrity father opens up to Us Weekly for the first time since the near-death experience that caused him to make life changes.

“I wanted to get out and have a good time,” Lamar says about the night in 2015 that police found him unconscious in a Nevada brothel. Lamar passed out after consuming a few alcoholic beverages. “I remember lying in bed. Two women were in bed and then I fell asleep. That’s all. When I woke up four days later, I was trying to pull the tubes out of my mouth.”

Lamar awoke to family members and friends who rushed to be by his side after getting wind of his condition. Khloe Kardashian joined Lamar’s kids and their mother, Liza Morales, in hoping for the best, which came just in time for Christmas 2015 when Odom was able to spend the day with his kids. The former NBA star was still in the hospital but, nevertheless, grateful to be in the company of loved ones.

“She was the first thing I saw,” Lamar says of opening his eyes to see Khloe Kardashian at his bedside. The former couple was in the middle of finalizing their divorce because of Odom’s infidelity and drug abuse. ” She played a major role in me getting my memory back,” Lamar explains. “She would bring pictures of my mother and my grandmother. I kept thinking, Am I paralyzed forever? Am I mute forever? It was scary sh*t. Faith got me through.”

The celebrity father’s kids, Destiny and Lamar Jr., also had a pivotal role in his recovery. “My daughter gave me the ultimatum to go. She said, ‘Pops, you get help or I won’t talk to you.’ I think she saw it in my behavior.” Such push was just what Lamar needed to get him going in the right direction.

“Living sober, meaning no drugs, is a great feeling,” Odom says. “Being in the moment is important — how you react, respond, create.”

Pick up the latest copy of Us Weekly to read Lamar Odom’s full tell-all interview!