Natural disasters, such as the devastating California wildfires, can leave a lasting impact on both communities and individuals. When these catastrophic events occur, it is common for parents to feel uncertain about how to address them with their children. For young minds, the effects of a disaster can be confusing, frightening, and emotionally overwhelming. The following are a few tips from the experts on how to talk to your children about the California fires and other recent natural disasters.
Be Honest but Reassuring
The first step in talking to your children about a natural disaster is to be honest about what is happening in the world around them. But, make sure to avoid overwhelming them with too many details. Young children don’t need to know all the grim facts, but they do need reassurance that they are safe and that their feelings are valid.
“When tragic natural disasters occur, such as wildfires or hurricanes, it can be difficult for kids to cope. It can be stressful for a person of any age, but for children, it’s much more anxiety-provoking,” Dr. Maneesh Kumar , DO, a pediatrician at Memorial Hermann Southwest Hospital, in Houston, TX, said in an interview with Parents.com. “That’s because they don’t always understand what happened and they don’t know what’s going to happen, which is frightening to them.”
Keeping things honest but reassuring will help lessen the anxiety for kids to cope with what is going on around them.
Understand Their Level of Concern
Children may react differently depending on their age and personality. Younger children may not fully understand the concept of wildfires or other disasters. They may simply feel uneasy about the emotions and tension they pick up from adults around them. Older children and teens may be more aware of the scope of the disaster through news coverage and social media.
It’s essential to ask your child open-ended questions about what they know or have heard. These questions help gauge their level of concern and allow you to address misconceptions they may have.
Validate Their Emotions
Children, especially when faced with the imagery of destruction in news reports, can feel fear, sadness, confusion, or anger. Validating these emotions is crucial to help them feel understood and will help them process their emotions in a healthy way. Encourage them to talk about how they feel and listen actively without dismissing their worries.
Explain the Safety Measures in Place
One of the most important aspects of these discussions is reassurance about safety. Children will feel more at ease if they understand what is being done to protect them and their communities. Emphasize the steps being taken to ensure that everyone is prepared. If appropriate, discuss evacuation plans, shelters, and community support systems.
Encourage Positive Actions
Instead of focusing solely on the destruction caused by disasters, try to shift the conversation toward the positive ways people are responding, helping children find “silver linings”.
“Your child looks to you for cues on how to think about this event and make it a part of his or her life experience,” Deborah Gilboa, MD, a family physician and author of Teach Resilience: Raising Kids Who Can Launch! said to Parents.com.
“If you focus on the positive aspects—who wasn’t hurt, what wasn’t lost—then your child will make that part of their dialogue as well, learning not only how to deal with this tragedy but also how to look at future obstacles.”
Set Boundaries on Media Exposure
While it’s important for children to be informed, excessive exposure to graphic images and distressing news reports can heighten anxiety. Monitor their media consumption, especially for younger children, and make sure they are not overwhelmed by images of destruction.
Provide Ongoing Support
The conversation shouldn’t stop after an initial discussion. Keep checking in with your child to see how they are coping, especially as the disaster’s aftermath continues to unfold. Reassure them that it’s okay to feel upset or confused, and offer comfort as needed. Allow them to express their feelings freely and validate their emotions.
Talking to your children with empathy, honesty, and careful attention to their emotional needs will help them navigate the complexities of these difficult events and make them feel safe, supported, and empowered in the face of disaster.
